The Haikus of a Disillusioned 18-year-old Male

Background: My little brother, who is 18 and over 6 feet tall, is my literary hero of the moment. He will be a freshman Mechanical Engineering major at SPU in the fall, and he hopes to "get really freaking smart and make tons of money." He is interested in environmental conservation from a more practical approach than that of the Biologists who he believe will just talk a lot and never actually do anything; he wants to actually design the electric cars and personal solar panels, not sit around in forests acting like a pussy and getting eaten by bears.

Life and career: At the beginning of the summer, my brother began work as a janitor-esque student worker at Seattle Pacific University. He worked hard every day and then became entangled in an inconvenient misunderstanding involving some other student workers, had to go to meeting after meeting explaining how nothing ever happened, yet was never fully absolved. The "situation" as we will call it became increasingly frustrating, the work became increasingly tedious, and currently, my brother is waiting for school to start so that he can do something other than scrub walls, throw away other people's trash, and defend himself, alone and unsupported, against fabricated accusations. One of the most intelligent people I have ever known, he is also one of the most staunchly realistic and matter-of-fact. This is why his haikus are so amazing.

For the first time ever in any kind of print, ladies and gentlemen, I bring you "Dubius" Daniel.


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Monotinous work

I long to be a robot

With no sense of time


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Time doesn't matter

Pictures can speak for themselves

We are sinking fast

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Anger of fire

Matter consumed by flame

Ashes are useless




Editor's Note: any effort at plagerism will result in the violent pokage of a fork into your optic nerve. From the gut wrenching cries and tounges bitten off in a fit of uncontrollable something or other, my guess is that it hurts.